February 9th, 2010
Palin-ophobia continues to spread in the Lib camp
The medical community is still befuddled over the continuing spread of the Palin-ophobia epidemic which has hit liberal circles and conclaves very hard. The outbreak seems to be hitting the liberal punditry particularly hard, who have been seen trembling and stammering by the few people who actually watch them on TV. Lib leaders are nervous that their solid media network is coming unglued and rattled by each of Palin’s trivial acts, and causing them to lose focus on the business at hand: Spending Money Fast.
The latest phobia panic came when Palin addressed a National Tea Party convention in Nashville, and had written some notes to herself on the palm of her hand. Naturally, the phobiacs went into hyper-freak. “I stopped doing that kind of stuff in high school after my fifth detention for cheating on tests,” a Democratic inner-city congressman admitted. “I finally had to memorize who the First president of the U.S. was….Washington, wasn’t it?”
It is nervous times for the Libs, and they want answers to deal with Palin-ophobia before it is too late. They have gone to the government-funded Medical Research Boondogglery Commission to try and find research studies that have analyzed syndromes like Palin-ophobia. But the Boondogglery has found nothing quite like this, although they did find interesting psychological studies of the mating practices of long-term civil service employees…with pictures.
Meanwhile, the jittery Lib leaders are pursuing possible medication alternatives to help calm them down. They have tried to make a case for being able to obtain medical marijuana in California, but even the whacko doctors out there have refuse to prescribe it for Palin-ophobia. “I think those reefer-brains are just making an excuse to get some cheap dope,” one doctor speculated.