November 14th, 2024
Sour Grapes Being Served
Sour Grapes are being served at the Fumblina Ferris headquarters and the Liberal Party compound after the recent election. Twelve different grape vendors have been summoned to provide the much needed sour grape selections. Each supplier has diverse levels of sourness, pungentness, throat-burning heat, foul odor, and/or difficulty-to-swallow factor. But some suppliers have been determined to have some “issues.”
The popular Blame Game Grapes Company has pointed out that the recent hospitalizations claiming grape food poisoning were not their fault. They say that the incidents were caused from Old Man Grape Company switching grapes with them, substituting their old stale grapes from Blame Game’s fresh grapes in the supermarkets. Blame Game says the Old Man’s were 81 years old, causing them to be worn out, stale, smelly, and undigestible.
The Economy Sour Grape Company grapes were determined to be excessively sour, almost like lemons, in spite of the company claiming they were actually borderline sweet. The company execs were accused of being obnoxious, boldfaced liars… worse than a 36-handicap golfer at the 19th hole.
The Border Sour Grapes came from Mexico, and were washed in Montezuma Revenge water, that contained excessive levels of urine and fecal matter. The company claimed the grapes were rewashed 17 times, but it turns out that no rewashing can eliminate the Montezuma factor that caused widespread GI problems in hundreds of communities.
Finally, the selections from the Disloyal Grape Company were disappointing because they were delivered in all kinds of different sizes, shapes, clone variety, and colors, with extraordinary levels of sourness and bitterness. Most supporters want to punish Disloyal for producing such bizarre results, totally unexpected, totally unacceptable… almost like their people had a brain freeze or something.
Fortunately, there were sufficient Sour Grapes to go around, and put all the attendees into a sufficiently sour mood. Many vow to stay in a sour mood for a long while, maybe even 4 years. Grape companies have confirmed that they can provide the sour grapes to satisfy their sour needs forever, if necessary.
