Whimsy, satire, irreverent humor, and hijinx from a place not so far away

Posts Tagged ‘cap and tax’

Dumbest, Period.

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January 25th, 2010 Posted 5:24 pm

Bizarreville Studios has just announced plans to begin shooting a new movie in Washington, DC.  The movie will be another sequel to the Dumb & Dumber comedy series, with the working title “Dumbest, Period.”  PR people at the studio say that it will be the funniest yet, with hijinx and situational bizarrity

The script, which is still in development with new hiliarious vignettes being written every day from real-life antics, will be about the Obama administration fumbling around with new programs, rules, and pronouncements out the ying-yang, but they never quite figure out that the real problem is Jobs, Jobs, Jobs.  Early in the movie, there will be a precious situation when the EPA Secretary tries to convince the President they will create 100 thousand new jobs with the so-called Cap&Tax program by increasing paperwork, permits, stupid reports, and general red tape.  Laughs become side-splitting as former productive factory workers stumble along trying to fill-out meaningless paperwork with work gloves on.

Then, the Treasury Secretary persuades the Cabinet that increasing taxes will increase jobs…by intentionally overcomplicating the Tax Code, eliminating those bothersome Short forms, so that no one can fill out their own taxes.  Hilarity is in abundance as regular Joes cuss, kick doors, and pee on the new forms before they finally throw in the towel.

But the best part of the story is when advisors keep telling the President that he should focus on Jobs…and within minutes, he develops temporary amnesia and keeps forgetting and forgetting.  His Aides have him write down “Jobs” on a piece of paper, but he keeps losing the paper.  Then he writes “Jobs” on his palm…but when he reads it back, he thinks it says “Joes” , and goes out for a seafood dinner.  Comedy hits its climactic peak when a football stadium full of people chant: “Jobs, jobs, jobs”, but the poor President thinks they are saying “Slobs, slobs, slobs” and just gets pissed.  The team on the field finally runs up to his box and dumps a bucketload of Gatorade on his head, as the scoreboard reads: It’s the Jobs, Stupid!!  And everyone ends up dancing on the field to the final song:  Take this job and shove it. 

Casting is well underway.  The Casting Director is looking for specific types of actors who can not only act dumb, but also just look dumb with a funny dumbness air about them…kind of like a 1950’s Jerry Lewis look.  The Director would like to hire some of the real officials in the administration for some of the parts, because clearly they possess the skills and personal attributes they’re looking for…and would be perfect in the roles.

The movie has a fairly small budget, but no matter:  They just plan to overrun it.  Would you expect anything less?


Disclaimer:  all stories in Bizarreville are fiction, even the ones that seem like they could be real.