bizarreville

Whimsy, satire, irreverent humor, and hijinx from a place not so far away

Corporations support the Public Option, so they can Deep Six current Health plans

A consortium of Bizarreville Business owners and Corporate chieftains are lobbying hard for quick passage of the Health Care bill Public Option (PO).  They are encouraging Legislators to ignore all the confusing/inconsistent polling numbers that bumble their way to gauge public opinion of the PO.  “Don’t believe the goofy numbers…trust us.  The PO will be a good thing.  It’s something we need, and need now,” cried the business people.

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Pundits were quite surprised that these pillars of industry were so vocally in favor of the PO.  The talking heads asked them if they understood that they would still have the option to keep their current plans.

“Pffffft…yeah, right…you think we’re gonna hold onto our lousy high-cost cruddy program, when we have this other option?  You think we’re gonna go to our Boards and tell them we’ve got two options:  one, continue to pay out the ying-yang for this headache-inducing health plan we’ve got now, or two, punt, get out of the freaking health care business, dump the costs, and let the feds do it?  Hmmmm…let me see, tough choice, let’s study it.

“We compete globally with Yoks whose employees are already covered by government programs, Mr. Homebones.  We have had a major competitive disadvantage versus these subsidized twerps.  Guess they’re a lot smarter than us numbskulls, cuz they figured this out decades ago.

“Seriously, if we could take Health care off our Balance Sheet, how many New York minutes do you think it would take for any of us to pull the lever on our programs?  One?  Two?  Na na na na hey hey, kiss it good-bye.  Take a photo of it quick and hang it on the wall for nostalgia.”

The Legislators were asked to respond to the Business’ strong support for the PO.  But they said, “They just don’t understand.  They can keep their current Health plans.  The Public Option is just an option, one option, not the only option.  From our standpoint, we would love to see them all keep their current plans intact.”

The Consortium responded, “Yeah, okay, ha-ha…okay it’s an Option.  We will most certainly consider that, and do a proper/thorough evaluation…sure will…just before flushing our programs down the Corporate toilet….ha ha ha ha…you guys really crack me up!”

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This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 21st, 2009 at 3:20 pm and is filed under Corporate shnooks, Health Care pffffft. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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